I don't enjoy blogging.
I don't feel like I'm doing it for myself. I feel like I have to be extra funny or cater to a certain audience with my posts. I don't want to seem whiny or too sarcastic or put something out here that will offend or otherwise draw negative attention to myself. So that pretty much sucks all the joy out of writing... (and let's face it, it's more work than a twitter post or an instagram)
I care too much about what others think. I always have.
I've seen so many bloggers be affected by negative comments and judgements from others. From small bloggers to the large, well-known Pinterest goddesses of the blogosphere...I haven't been affected yet but I know I will take it personally when it does happen.
On the other hand, I know I want to have this blog to look back on throughout my medical education. I want to see the growth. I want to see how my life changes. In order to do that, I gotta write.
From now on...I have to be Heather. Just Heather. I'll write when I want, about whatever sounds good at the moment. I hope you all will still be around to read it!
I'm done with worrying about numbers, social media, sponsorships, and anything else extra. I just can't take it! It makes me miserable. I want to write and interact with you all and be done with it.
Enough with the excuses...if you don't like how things are going, you have to change it or you'll keep getting the same results! This goes with everything else in my life too: school, getting healthy, relationships, etc.
I have lots of updates for you all in the next couple days. I just wanted to get this off my chest and start fresh. Here's to a year filled with more blogging and progress!
Shameless selfie :)
You're beautiful, have a blessed life, and are talented and smart enough to get into med school! Anyone who has a problem with that has no business judging. I am so happy to see another post, but also bummed you started to dislike blogging. I'm an osteopathic M1 myself, and I really like reading about your life, your struggles match mine! Whenever you fear the negativity (and there are some really mean things said about people, I see where you are coming from) just think of all the people who get joy out of your blog! It really does make my day to read your thoughts :) Have a great new year and good luck with studying when you go back!
ReplyDeleteYou're right - writing for others sucks all the fun out of everything. Once I stopped feeling like I had to write certain topics or stick to a certain "niche" for my blog, I had a lot more fun writing what I felt like. Sure, I have a small readership but I think the ones who do read really enjoy it. And I enjoy writing it.
ReplyDeleteI hope you can find that place with your own blog! Happy New Year :)
Babe that is the only way to make it in this crazy Blog land we have. Just be you, as I see below and you see with my comment, you have friends here who love you just the way you are. This is YOUR space, YOUR life, and YOUR memories... don't do this for anyone else but you!
ReplyDeleteI agree! You need to do what is right for you, and not feel fake! I would definitely stay to read all :)
ReplyDeleteThis is YOUR blog. I hope you can find enjoyment in blogging for YOU again. I'll be here supporting you every step of the way girl.
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